jones the grocer.. that wasn't. or isn't. or could be.

disappointing.  well, not completely. but huh.  ok.  let me start at the beginning. i called jones the grocer for a reservation as i was told it was THE place for brunch in dempsey.  umm.. where have i heard that before.  right. house.  huh.  so dempsey take two. i am determined to find a place in this fab village that i love because i want to spend every sunday wandering around, brunching, visiting, sipping tea  and pretending that i am a fab wealthy expat.  ha! like the rest of the people that parade their posh cars up and down dempsey hill.  riiiiiiight.

so.. i was told they didn't take reservations but the queue started around 10:30 so it was advisable to  show up early. huh. a restaurant in singapore that didn't take reservations. that does not bode well.

and the way it starts sometimes is the way it means to go on.  sunday was a late start.  i meant to meet claire at holland village and go over early to get a table, but then i started late (sunday morning dammnit!) and there was a jam enroute to holland village due to the exhumation of dead bodies in the bukit brown graveyard on the way.  what? yes. apparently, according to my taxi driver  the graveyard is being razzed to make way for a new road, so families have been asked to collect the bodies, if they would like.  most  families, my cabbie explained ask their local temple to exhume them and perform a ceremony for them then cremate them.  the taxi driver knew this as it had happened to his ancestors who were housed in a different plot of land the government had wanted a few years prior and he had to do the same thing.  actually, after i thought about it, i wasn't as shocked as you may think i should have been. i remembered they do the same thing in hong kong.  well actually everyone does it, not just a few plots of lands here and there. grave space is essentially non existence in hong kong proper and so grave sites are leased for 100 years.  after the lease is up, the grave is open, but the graveyard guy, the bones are removed and cremated and returned to the family and new dead person moves in.  actually it is fascinating. i read an article about it once and you know how weird facts just kinda stick in your head. well,  apparently in hong kong they are having a shortage of grave yard guys.  no one seems to want to work in the grave yard anymore.  not because its boring or there are more ghosts around, or they are not paid enough.  actually they are being paid more. the problem is our modern diet. our food and medicines contains more preservatives than they used to.  so what used to take 100 years to decompose takes longer.  so the grave yard guys in hong kong used to be able to open the graves to find clean white bones, now they are opening up the graves to not completely decomposed mush. i knew you wouldn't believe me, so read this article straight from the horse's mouth.. or the exhumer ah hoi's mouth. 

on that note, back to breakfast.  so the seating is odd at jones the grocer.  trying to be hip, i think, they have these gorgeous large tables, where they sit people where ever there is an empty seat.  so at our table, with 6 people (our party) we also had 3 girls on one side and a random man all by himself at the end.  huh. ok the second confusing thing is the menu.  they have a breakfast menu from 9 to 12.  then a brunch menu from 12 -5.  what? but i thought, on sunday, brunch was breakfast. and the lady on the phone specifically told me to come at 10:30 for brunch because it would get busy.  and the brunch menu had things i could eat and eggs benedict for claire.  the breakfast menu had crap.  eggs, spanish eggs, eggs on toast with sausages and toast.  ugh.  ugh. ugh.  i asked the waiter if we could order from the brunch menu. "no cannot".  not really understanding why its entirely possible to make toast with a poached egg on top, but not one with added ham and hollandaise sauce for an eggs benedict.  ugh. and  i was sitting beside claire who only comes to brunch for her eggs benedict, so she was pissed.

and back to singapore signature service. lizzie and frankie ordered the spanish eggs and got them super fast; god knows why. me and claire who had arrived early to get the table, were the last served. me, i think because mine was SUPER COMPLICATED.  because there wasn't anything i could order from the menu and when i asked if there was anything the waiter could recommend for someone who didn't eat eggs or meat.. "no cannot". so i ordered toast and 2 sides.  i asked if the 2 sides to be combined into a kind of mash, but that was also rather difficult, so i got a bowl of roasted tomatoes halves (2) and a bowl of sauteed spinach in garlic.  yep and THAT took an hour.  it took so long, that frankie ordered another order of coconut pancakes being still hungry after her massive frying pan of spanish eggs and side of toast....and she finished BOTH before me.

ok, it was not all negative.  the bread was fackin' delicious.  you can not imagine how good the bread was.  superb.  or was it cause i was starving? i have no idea.  i do know that we were so frustrated with the dumb breakfast/brunch menu and the crazy dumb wait that we didn't even think about dessert.  grr.  fine.  i wasn't really hungry after the giant slabs of soft, fresh french bread with gorgeous crusty crusts and lovely homemade marmalade. and when, i would like to know, did i start liking marmalade? i used to think it was so bitter and sour.. and only stuff that grandmothers ate while watching coronation street.

conversation was stilted in between discussions of the lame table arrangements (with odd people at the end), menu issues (why no eggs benedict?), and constant refrains of  "where the hell is our food?"  but laura did brave the mean girls (that was us) and brought her adorable bali boy.  he was  visiting still (much to lizzies' great pleasure) and he was cute, even though he doesn't speak much (any) english and is 23 years  old!  whatever, girl's got to have her fun.  better to talk about that than our lame jobs and our lame habit of overworking, over analyzing and over complaining about said jobs. 

did i mention the bread was good?  and we could pay in separate bills which saves us addition confusion.. good in this case as it was crazy expensive.. i had thought it was also a food store and i might want to buy some food stuffs (or that bread) to take home.. but cookies were $18 each... huh..but..it was in dempsey, so kudos for after brunch wanderings, of  which we didn't do this time because everyone was pissed off and still hungry, expect frankie, who was full.   2.5 stars (mainly for the bread).

Jones the Grocer
12 Dempsey Rd  Singapore 247697
Tel: 6476 1512

in the pantry....where the marmalade is sweet.

now that, is what i call a damn fine brunch.  the marmalade pantry at the stables was suggested by claire.  a damn fine good call. ok, if we are being honest, yes, at first we were skeptical.  since we had no idea where in the hell the stables were.  we: kathy, lizzie, laura and isabella are from the east end of singapore.  claire is from the west.  she had heard from a friend of a friend.  and we all know how good her last friend's angelic suggestion was.  anyhoo....

we: kathy, lizzie, laura and isabella met at the botanical garden mrt and shared a taxi to 'the stables' on the edge of the reservoir.  our cabbie was sufficiently confused by us. he had no idea why anyone would want to head out to the stables, especially on a damp sunday morning. but then we were ang mo (foreigners), so maybe we'd like to see the horses. he drove us along fairways green drive very slowly, pointing at all the happy grazing horses we passed on the way (3).  there were lessons to we could take, just for foreigners to learn how to ride all the old retired horses.  yay! our lucky day.  yeah we weren't taking lessons.

the restaurant was nestled right beside the stables. i had made reservations for inside, but when we got there we decided to sit outside under the fanned canopy.  it was a brilliant decision. during our 3 hour brunch, it was sunny, it was windy, it rained, and it was not once, hot.  a totally delightful day! you know really nothing can compare to sitting outside in the middle of a city surrounded by lush tropical greenery, overlooking empty lush fields, listening to the rain pitter patter on the canopy over your head.  at one time, it rained so hard, we couldn't see anything, just a grey mist. we could have been in scotland overlooking the moors and not even known it.  so refreshing!

i ordered a falfael wrap, again, a delightful surprise being able to order something from the menu.  it was bland.  but whatev's. there was ketchup.  i am not sure i will ever find a good 'vegan' dish here in singapore.  at least it was edible. the tea was delightful, served with its very own tea pot (love that!)  my fellow brunchers however, looked to have made much better choices.  clair got her beloved eggs benedict, which she said was divine. kathy and isabella got the breakfast: eggs, bacon and toast and of course laura got the pancakes.  and then we all got the cupcakes. yay!  really, how could you not.  they were set up inside on a giant table just daring you to order them.  ok. mine was a fail.  it was called chocolate extreme and i just couldn't pass it up.  i didn't see it on the table but i thought.. if they looked that good.. just imagine!  i had visions of a mountain of chocolate icing, with a warm melted lava center, maybe a few chocolate chips to add crunch and then a drizzle of chocolate syrup over the whole thing. yup. imagine disappointment.  dry and flaky and not that chocolately.. and no icing.  isabella got the red velvet with gorgeous cream cheese icing and i almost cried in jealously. (i'm not joking. it looked fackin' awesome)

but whatever.. i had two packets of raw sugar in my tea. who needs chocolate anyways? this brunch our conversation was rather interesting. we spent alot of time talking about how sometimes it can be rather unfair (in a fantastically good way) to be blonde in a foreign country. isabella has a phd in esl education.  she also has short brown hair and could barely get a job in japan, so i cannot begrudge her a good cupcake now and then, especially since i have only a uni diploma, long blonde hair and have been hired way too many times, in all parts of asia solely based on my photo (hair colour/skin colour). 

there is a marmalade pantry in orchard ion.  and we almost went there instead, but since then i have walked past said restaurant. and to be honest, ugh. its in the middle of a mall. with people (like me) walking by and looking at you.  its not that the marmalade pantry has that good food, the food was ok.  but what makes it such a freakin' delight (and what justifies the rather expensive prices) is the ambiance.  when one lives and works everyday in the saturated, crowded, noisy, chaotic concrete jungle that is singapore, a moment (or 3 hours) in a green horse stable-y heaven is divine.  DIVINE!   4 1/2 stars.

The Marmalade Pantry at the Stables
55 Fairways Dr  Singapore 286846

Tel: 6467 7748

one thousand angels.. that would rather be in heaven.

a suggestion by claire.  its actually called tea cozy.. but i think everyone just calls it one thousand angels.  she hadn't been able to make it for brunch lately because of her kid and was trying to get everyone together for a sunday meet up... and i think plaza singapura was a central location.  let's go with that idea.  god knows why else you would go there.  ok.  maybe i'm a biased snob.. but come on.  a tea house.. in a mall.. beside a spotlight?  i went a bit early thinking i would get a cup of tea in and relax before anyone else arrived.  and i did have time.  just that no one came over to take my order.  for a half an hour!  claire did make a good reservation.  we got the luxurious leather chairs (with price tags asking $1000 for each, even though people had been sitting in them since the beginning of time and they were scratched and stained.. and....).  the menu was interesting - offering high tea things like scones and cupcakes as well as wannabe american items like club sandwiches, steak and potatoes and lasagne.  and.. more interesting.. they had a full page for their special cupcakes.  yum!  until i stood up to look at them.  and i couldn't see them. not because they weren't on display, but because they were the size of my thumbnail.  ok, maybe not THAT small.. but for $15.00 a piece?  cup-morsels they should be called.  humph.

so not many ladies actually showed up.  not that i blame them.  it was kinda dusty, and drab and the place was chock full of small little white angel statues.  you know the ones that your grandmother's friend, the weird quiet one down the street that offers you stale cookies has all over her house.  yep. and they were all for sale.  it was busy, crowded and noisy.  and super over priced.  like raffles high tea prices.  only this ain't raffle's baby.  and the food was miniscule.  laura just ordered hot chocolate because honestly, the menu was odd.

i ordered the tofu salad and scones.  the scones were the size of a silver dollar.  the tofu salad was just that, cold tofu over iceberg lettuce. what the? the english breakfast tea was nice though.  but then.. how can you go wrong there?

yeah.  i don't know. meh.  meh place. meh conversation.  meh food. meh service. crazy stupid prices (for said meh food).  1 star.

Tea Cozy aka One Thousand Angels.
05-10 Plaza Singapura.  beside Spotlight. yay!
68 Orchard Road
Tel: 6341 9318

the barracks or house or who cares.....

this was a weird one.  everyone i've talked to in singapore told me this was the place for brunch. especially for their world famous sliders.  which essentially are small pork burgers with steamed buns.  which was not something i would order. ever.  so yeah.. 

i called the day before and it was quite hard to actually nail down the name of this place.  its listed as the barracks or house or i'm not really sure.  i called a few numbers before i could finally make a reservation.  and then, really did it matter?  there were loads of empty seats when we arrived.

it was just me, lizzie and laura for this morning's feast.  laura didn't order pancakes, cause why would you? 7 layer pancakes - 7 layers of fluffy butter pancakes with hidden gems and spreads like nutella, green raisins, dried apricots, maple syrup,  hazelnuts and pistachios. ok, maybe they sounded good, but not like brunch good, more like dessert good.  so instead she ordered  the very berry stuffed french toast  she's vegetarian, so i love going for brunch with her. it doesn't make me stand out as the only freak in the group.  lizzie ordered the asparagus and poached eggs  from the 'good for the heart' menu .  and me?  huh.  i ordered the macadamia crusted pumpkin with argula salad.  actually it was very nice to be able to order something off the menu that was pretty much vegan.  it only had some weird cream sauce thing on top...so i didn't have to call out the chef and get him to whip me up a special dish. since it was just salad...and our brunches usually last for hours i thought i might be hungry so ordered taro chips on the side.

the service was odd.  i think its a singaporean thing, where different meals come out at different times, and apparently it takes an hour to make a cappuccino. ok, in reality it was more like 45 minutes to make 2 cappuccinos.  lucky for me i had ordered english breakfast tea. the taro chips came right away and we all dug in.  but then, ugh.  waaaay too much oil  i'm not sure if it was the tea or the chips.. but i was nauseous. i never get nauseous in the morning.  especially when i am eating.  and no,  it was not morning sickness, so don't even ask.  it went away after i stopped eating the chips and had a few bites of lizzie's dry toast.

the macadamia encrusted salad i ordered was bland. essentially it was a massive slice of baked pumpkin covered in a weird mayonnaise wannabe sauce on one side and a rocket salad on the other.  ok, the salad was ok.  really, how can you screw up rocket with oil and lemon?

laura and lizze were patient; as patient as one can be waiting an hour (right, 45 minutes) for a cappuccino.  but they didn't finish their meals either and we didn't  stay for dessert which sucks because they have warm chocolate toffee cake on the menu which in my mind must be a delectable mix of hot lava cake and warm sticky toffee pudding.. two of my most favourite things on earth.. mmm....

maybe i should have been worried when i went to the bathrooms.  actually, maybe not.  the bathrooms are pretty damn cool with quotes and poems and stuff on the walls.  and they are clean.  and they are attached to the building.. .what?  but.. but...what respectable restaurant titles their bathrooms 'pussy cat' and 'rooster' ladies and men's respectively?  guess it could have been worse.  they could have called the men's 'cockadoodledo'... or just right to the point.. 'cock'.  but the real story of the day was that a) i'm seeing someone new and b) laura has invited her boy from bali to visit her for two weeks.  what?  i know!  which one of those is hardest to believe?!?!  oh and c) lizzie was not impressed at all about either... mwha....

one thing i'll say, dempsey hill is the shit.  its a really cool little village. and it makes one (me) wish she still had her car.  but its an easy taxi ride from holland village. and worth it just to wander round the furniture shops after eatings, dreaming of furnishing that massive old colonial house with hand carved teak chairs and gorgeous silk throws by the riverside that one (me) will have one imminent day.  dempsey hill, i think was made for sunday brunch.  and the barracks did serve me my tea, early, and really, there are not that many things better whilst living in hot humid singapore than a cup of hot tea in sub zero air conditioning on a sunday morning.  so, not a complete fail. so 2.5 stars. 

Dempsey House
80 dempsey road
tel 64757787

baci....blah....

Life is simple and beautiful.
Be grateful for what you have.
Want little.
How to be happy?
Find something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.
Even little things count.
A strong hot coffee and sweet biscuit will help start the day right.
When the sun shines, be happy for the light.
When it rains, be happy for the earth.
Love and respect the people around you.
Be kind to yourself.
If it's time to eat, enjoy every bite.
If it's time to work, enjoy every effort.
Every single moment of life is precious, so be there in the moment.
Your presence is beautiful.
- Love and kisses, from Baci.

baci re-creates an authentic italian experience, serving quality Italian coffee and fresh, café-style food in a neighbourhood setting inspired by European coffee culture, where people relax, share, and enjoy each other’s company. together with highly experienced chefs, baci’s deliciously unique recipes are inspired by italian classics, using only natural, fresh ingredients. it also strives to avoid adding any artificial additives such as colours, flavours and sweeteners...... which is what the menus said..... AND.... which looked fantastic!  seriously.  it was such a quaint little cafe.. you could literally taste the cappuccino on your lips when you walked in. clean, italian, white, crisp and empty.  a perfect place for sunday morning brunch.  and because it was so lovely italianio i decided to go a bit loco and bruschetta.  cappuccino and bruschetta.  are you kidding me?  i was drooling with the possibility of the deliciousness of my breakfast (not to mention the insane chocolate lava cakes on the menu for desert)  and then laura ordered pancakes.  DOH!  no pancakes.  what the? what?  pancakes were right their written in lovely italian script on their special 11-2 brunch menu, and it was just past 11 on sunday morning but they were out of pancakes.
"out of pancakes?  how can that be?  can your chef not cook some more?" i asked.
"no," the waitress said.
"i don't understand," i said.
"we are out of flour," she said.
"huh." i said, completely perplexed.  a restaurant at 11:00 am on a sunday morning with a special brunch menu....out of flour?!?!?
there was no making of any sense out of that one.  and laura could not be made to order anything else.  not that i blame her.  when one's heart is set on a lovely description of banana pancakes, fluffy and light with real maple syrup on the side, its hard to settle for scrambled egg on toast.  which would explain why the restaurant was empty.  on a sunday morning.  just past 11.
so we got up and left.

we wandered around 112 katong looking for someplace, somewhere else, for breakfast... and finally settled on a random restaurant, chinese wannabe western, where i had to order pasta because there was no brunch menu, no toast, no vegetables, no recognizable anything. well, maybe there was something but at the time kathy had just told me that whitney houston had just been found dead and my brain was in shock.  i mean, what? how?  why?  my heart is broken.  what a waste.  what a sad sad waste. 

ha!  baci you suck.  you and your lame flour.
1 star (for the possibility)

 Baci Italian Cafe
#01-07  112 Katong    112, East Coast Road
 Tel: 6636 3544

wild honey... that's not so wild.

 this wasn't a brunch thing, more like a lunch thing, just me and laura.  but wild honey serves all day breakfast.  and its a popular little joint.   a bit hard to find on the third floor of mandarin gallery on orchard.  not as hard to find as the washrooms though.  NOT included with the restaurant but in the mall, down the hall, and around the corner, and then down another hall.

i was excited to go to wild honey.  their website is awesome.  it just makes you drool. their restaurant is nice... but small... there was only two of us, so we fit nicely at our table.  but as i looked around the restaurant it was hard to picture where all 5 of us brunch ladies would sit and how long would we have to wait for a table on a sunday morning... and then there was the attitude.  you know the one when you walk into a louis vitton store or a a tiffany's. a hush in the air, a slight shift in the eyes as you are upraised, a small tilt to the head as you majestically led to your table.. yeah..a bit pretentious for me.  i mean its breakfast for god's sake. 

after we were most graciously shown to our table, because we were so lucky that they had space for us...we had to go up to the cash register to order.  why? there were servers milling all around.  why is it so difficult for them to take orders?  maybe they were trying to go for a new york deli style.  which would have been cool and fitting, considering the menus were written with chalk paint on a large blackboard but then why have servers show us to our seats?

the manager or owner or head honcho was there to take our orders.  a chef from new mexico. which was cool to talk to the chef. who showed us through his suped up menu on the ipad with lovely professionally done photos.  but damn.. can i say confusing?  and odd.  i know he created the dishes so he's all proud of them, but he was so, almost difficult, when i asked for the californian without eggs. he was almost insulted because then the vegetables wouldn't stay together as well. i'm well aware of what eggs will or will not do for a dish.  but i am also aware that i am the customer and a vegan and i don't want eggs.  same for laura, she ordered the mexican without ..... and he wasn't happy about that.  so then you have to pay straight away. which made life totally difficult when i ordered a cappuccino later.  and can i say fack me?  that's one expensive breakfast. over $50.00 for two dishes?

and as the owner/manager/head honcho spent an eternity taking us through every menu item on the ipad a line formed behind us.  a long line.  of hungry customers.  who had to go through the same spiel after us.  with growling stomachs.  odd.  just give me a damn menu at my table and be done with it.

the food, was fantastic.  even without eggs.  it was really well done.  the bread on the californian was lovely.  toasted to perfection. soft inside, crispy outside.  and on each table is a small dish of real sea salt, like the big chunky kind, that really gives you a good kick of salt for your sprinkle.

so me and laura had lots to talk about, she having just returned from weeks of touring bali and being romanced by the balinese and me just having returned from a week in yoygakarta and not being romanced at all.  not true.  i am/was being romanced by a lovely singaporean local who is burning up my whatsapp daily.  he's smart, handsome, and makes me laugh.  he's also only separated from his wife and a lawyer.  hence my dilemma.  not sure what makes him harder to trust; the separation from his wife or that he's a lawyer.

after about 2 hours of in-depth conversation, laura has advised me to not think too much about it and just enjoy it.  huh.  easier said than done to a virgo.  i think too much about what i'm going to eat (no. really?  cause i only write a blog about the food i eat, nothing OCD about that).

so wild honey.  huh.  an enigma.  either a deli or an expensive restaurant?  what are you?  cappuccinos are

divine. even with soy milk.  food was delicious.  restaurant set up is odd. ordering is a nightmare.  prices are way too high, even if your address is on orchard street.  its breakfast for god's sake!  so yeah 3.5 stars.  provided you do NOT go on a sunday.. and before the crowd.... cause there's no reservations... what?

Wild Honey
Mandarin Gallery   333a Orchard Road  3rd floor
TEL: 6235 3900

i loves me some bali thai

 kathy, isa,bella me and laura hit bali thai after our vacation... and had a mini re-vacation.  it wasn't really a brunch place... no eggs, bacon or toast.  but really... who cares when you can have awesome food and awesome conversation?  did i mention awesome food?

we got to the restaurant around 11ish and left at 3 ish. we had a beautiful seat by the window. the decor was all green and white and dark bali wood, the kind of decor that makes my heart sing.  so relaxing. so fresh.

bali style lime iced tea for all to start.  refreshing.  divine refreshment. (i had to order it again!) then green

curry for me.  yay!  so good, not to spicy.  lovely jasmine rice and green tea.  oh..my green taste buds in overdrive.  kathy and isabella split a curry soup thing (they eat fish and meat so it had all these weird tentacles sticking out.. which they seemed to enjoy).  laura had pad thai.  yeah, i didn't pay too much attention to what anyone else was eating as i was in love, IN LOVE with my food and the gorgeous little green and black ornate dishes it was served on.

kathy and isabella had just spent a month, (a month!) sailing around thailand by themselves.  they spent a few nights in a small town in the north, up in the rainforest, living in a tree house with no walls, sleeping under the stars. can you imagine anything as delightful?  i went to phuket, actually kamala beach which is just a small beach nearby, and relaxed.  i woke up every morning for a jog down the beach, followed by a fantastic smorgasboard of breakfast then suntanning all day (with the occasional dip in clear turquoise calmness and fried mango pancakes) then massage, then green curry and pad thai then watching the sun set over the water with the smell of plumeria flowers wafting through my windows every night. damn.

this was delicious. brunch or no brunch.  damn fine.
4 and 1/2 stars.  i would probably even give it 5.   if it wasn't so far away from central
...........and if someone else paid.:)

Bali Thai
#02-11 112 Katong 112 East Coast Road
Tel: (65) 6636 3877